Sometimes the jokes just write themselves.
Deptford officers were dispatched to the area of Tanyard Road and Brenner Drive on Dec. 6 for a report of a loose pig. Through the use of “deescalation” techniques and the latest technology, they apprehended the suspect.
He was identified as Albert Einswine, a 4-year-old from the New Sharon section of the township. Mr. Einswine was released on his own recognizance.